FIFA Bans Replays in Stadiums During Games

In the wake of some really, really, SHITTY officiating in this edition of the World Cup, FIFA has done what any good dictatorial organization would do. Step 1-express your absolute support for the issue in question. As my dad used to say, “Denial ain’t just a river.” If you don’t acknowledge the problem, then there is no problem, correct? Step 2- outlaw anything related to your non-problem. If the fans in the stadium can’t see the correct call on the TVs the size of Slovenia, they can’t REALLY know if the call was missed, correct?

EHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-wrong FIFA!! The goddamn games are still broadcast all over the f**king WORLD!! Live, and in color!! Just because your fans are predominantly ignorant, Third World, poor people doesn’t mean you have to treat them as such, does it?

From FIFA’s standpoint, though, they have no reason to treat their fans with anything resembling respect. Their fans are NOTORIOUS for their violent nature. Googling “football violence” will yield you almost 12 MILLION hits. The Wikipedia page for hooliganism is nearly as long as the entry for World War 2.  These degenerates aren’t even allowed to ATTEND games in some places in Europe.

But maybe the Steel Curtain FIFA has some burden to carry for all of this sociopathic behavior from their fans. I must admit-if I was used to most games ending with no loser, I too might go berserk if my dear squad were to suffer defeat. And maybe my lunacy would extend to gross acts of ultra-violence and aberrant behavior. Were FIFA to institute a policy of replay on close goals and allowing the competition to end in a winner/loser dichotomy (for you soccer fans), there would undoubtedly be violence. But after a few hundred instances, they will get the point. Give your sweet, deprived fans what they deserve FIFA-the TRUTH!!