As of yesterday, Leinert is looking for a new job as the Arizona Cardinals have released the former Heisman winner in favor of ex-Browns Quarterback (BUM!!!) Derek Anderson.

Leinart, who has always been somewhat ridiculed throughout his NFL career as being someone who cares more about being famous than being a starting Quarterback, has to now look back at his past choices and wonder if he made the right decision to stay his Senior year. Especially considering that he would have been the #1 pick in the 2005 draft had he came out as a Junior.

Leinart ended up falling to the #10 pick in the 2006 draft, making a measly $14 mil in guaranteed money. And while for poor-fucks like me realize that is still a ton of money, Alex Smith, the #1 pick in the 2005 draft received $24 million in guaranteed cash, while purple-drank-fat-boy made $29 million guaranteed in 2007. Mario Williams was the #1 pick in 2006 (the year Leinart went #10), and he got $26.5 million guaranteed.

But the whole reason I’m pointing this out, is the fact that since Leinart decided to go back to USC for his Senior year, he not only left about $10-12 million in guaranteed money on the table, but he would have also had the chance to still be starting for the 49ers. I mean, they are giving Alex Smith another chance, so you know Leinart at least wouldn’t have been cut by now.

So all I’m saying is that I hope Leinart’s Senior year was a blast. I hope all the party’s and girls and temporary fame was worth $10 mil and a chance at a starting job in the NFL. I also hope he saved some of that $14 he received in guaranteed money – because who knows if he will have the chance to sign a contract like that ever again.

Mathews, who is the Chargers 2010 first round pick, had a condition that whenever he got the shit hit out of him, his nose would start bleeding. A condition that basically forced him to get a procedure done, called cauterizing.

When the doctor shoves this hot rod up your nose, it basically causes a scab that prevents the nose from bleeding. Some people have to have it done over and over, while others say they get it done once, and they’ve never had to worry about it again. Then some people feel the need to go on a sports blog and discuss how their wife had a similar procedure done to her “hoo hoo” (Read the comments, pretty damn funny).

But Mathews seems to be recovering pretty well from the procedure.

“It feels like I have a cold right now because I’m so stuffed up,” Mathews said. “It wasn’t fun, but hopefully it works.”

For Mathews sake, I too hope the procedure does work. But if it doesn’t, he can always look on the bright side. At least he didn’t have the hot poker shoved up his “hoo hoo”.

Money for what do you ask? Gambling? Some kind of Bribery for keeping secrets? No, much less dramatic.

Former Giants Punter Jeff Feagles told Sports Illustrated that Burress never paid Feagles for the deal they made in Burress obtaining Feagles’ #17 jersey – deals that are made all the time between teammates in the NFL. Feagles had already previously given his #10 jersey to Eli Manning, and Manning paid for Feagles’ family to go on a Florida vacation (I guess he couldn’t afford Hawaii or anything).

And even though Feagles didn’t charge Burress a monetary amount, Burress did allegedly agree to pay for Feagles’ outside kitchen to be remodeled. An agreement that Burress apparently did not follow through with.

“I never got paid for it,” Feagles said. “I asked [Burress] for it. Every time I went to Drew [Rosenhaus, Plaxico's agent] he said, ‘That’s between you and Plax.’ Bottom line, I never got paid. He basically stole my number.”

Some pretty harsh words coming from a 44-year-old Punter. I mean, just because Plax is locked up, don’t mean he ain’t got no eyes and ears on the outside.  Feagles better watch his back…

Clarett has requested to be given permission to travel in order to play in the UFL. What team you ask would be crazy enough to give Clarett another chance? None other than the 2^ndpride of Nebraska, the Omaha Nighthawks. But getting the Nighthawks to agree to take Clarett was no easy task for the Big Ten. It involved many long nights of negotiating tactics. The conversation probably went something like this.

Big Ten – “Listen Nebraska, you’re a great school, with great tradition, and we really feel that you would be a perfect fit for the Big Ten. However, this is one of those situations, where, if we scratch your back, you have to scratch ours…We need you to take Maurice Clarett when he gets out of prison.”

Nebraska – “Ok”

And that’s how the deal was done. No wheeling and dealing here. Big Ten said jump, and Nebraska said how high? And as someone who can’t forget the amazing performance Clarett put on during Ohio State’s National Championship, I hope the deal works out for both sides. But people of Omaha beware…and watch your daughters.

You either want to play football or you don’t.  You’re either hurt, or you’re not.  You’re either good enough, or you’re not.

These are not difficult concepts, but Haynesworth is having a very difficult time grasping them.

When he said that he liked the 3-4 a week or so ago, my first thought was, “Who gives a shit?”  He’s not the coach.  You play whatever the coach tells you to, Albert.

His money has given him a sense of entitlement no one could have thought possible.  OK, I take that back, EVERYONE thought it was possible.  It was obvious that the Redskins were making a huge mistake when they signed him, and boy are they paying for it now.

Then he couldn’t pass the conditioning test that everybody and their mom seemed to be able to pass.  That saga dragged on for 10 freaking days! 

“I’m a ninth-year pro. I don’t think I should’ve been out there in the third quarter.”

Haynesworth must be thinking he’s still dealing with Jim Zorn.  Mike Shanahan doesn’t give two shits about Haynesworth or his salary. 

Big Al’s most recent beef with his coach is over him playing in the third quarter of the 2nd pre-season game last night against the Ravens. They haven’t even made it to the first game of the season yet, and he’s already running his mouth.

“It was all right,” he said. “Third quarter, though? I’m a ninth-year pro. I don’t think I should’ve been out there in the third quarter. But for having ‘headaches’ again, that’s what they wanted to do.”

I still wish he would have been banned from the NFL for life for stomping on Andre Durode’s face a few years ago.  How come everyone forgets that he did that?  What kind of piece of shit rips off an opponent’s helmet and stomps on his face?  I’ll tell you what kind: this kind.  Albert Haynesworth is a disgrace to all humanity.

His nickname around here has been “Albert Shit-Stainsworth”, or just “Shit Stains” for short for a little while now.  Here’s to hoping Dan Snyder can find a way to cut his sorry, worthless, mouthy, fat, entitled/spoiled ass — landing him in the unemployment line where he can rot out the rest of his life with Barroid Bonds.

At least in 2008 and 2009 the last two years they waited until September. This year they wasted no time sucking up the place and continuing their ongoing and seemingly neverending embarrassment.

But they’re not alone.  After all, lots of teams have sucked for a long time.  But it takes a special kind of sucking to do it for this long.  A tip of the hat must go to the Pirates organization for proving that it is possible to be worthless for this long and continue to hold a major league franchise.  What the over/under on when this streak will end?  25 years?  35 years?  Ever?

Think about this:  If the Pirates won every single game from now on, they would finish .500.  And we’re still in August!

So who are the teams with the most consecutive losing seasons in sports history?  We break it down by league.

Most consecutive losing seasons in NFL history: Tampa Bay Buccaneers (14 years)

The NFL team with the most losing seasons since the Super Bowl are the Tampa Bay Buccaneers.  They lost 14 seasons in a row starting from 1983 all the way to 1996. Until 1997, the Buccaneers were the de facto standard for irrelevancy in the NFL.  If it weren’t for the 2008 Detroit Lions, we would still be calling the 1976 Buccaneers 0-14 team as the worst in NFL history.

Most consecutive losing seasons in NBA history: Kansas City/Sacramento Kings (15 years)

Amazingly, the Kings enjoyed their historic run at futility during the same time as the Buccaneers — except they stayed in the losers club for one more year.  During that streak their record was 455-775.  Damn.

Most consecutive losing season in MLB history: Pittsburgh Pirates (18 years and counting)

Not since the days of Barry Bonds, Bobby Bonilla, Andy Van Slyke and Jim Leyland has this team mattered at all.  That’s right, skinny Barry Bonds.  They are a perpetually “rebuilding” franchise that appears to have completely fallen off the map.  It is impossible to believe that this team can have any fans left at all.

Here ’s the 2008 story.  Here’s the 2009 story.  Here’s today’s story.  They all read exactly the same.  Just a few different names.

He has met with producers interested in doing a movie on his life story. If Brenda had her way, Warner said, Denzel Washington would land the lead role.

“It would probably challenge Denzel in ways he’s never been challenged before,” Warner mused.

But not since Dave Chapelle in the “Racial Draft” has someone successfully attempted this type of transition. The Wayans Brothers tried it in “White Chicks”, but it is much different when the movie is not a comedy (Well, not supposed to be anyway).

But if Denzel is going to play Kurt, then by golly, who in the world would be able to play Brenda? Oprah? Mick Jagger? The girl from “Precious“? The possibilities are endless.

Last Angry Fan

We’ve been developing a section of our website called The JOCKpost Game Room, where we are hosting classic Nintendo sports games to be played right here on our website!

Fresh off the Tecmo Super Bowl presses is the newest version, Tecmo Super Bowl 2011, featuring updated rosters from the 2010-2011 NFL season including Sam Bradford, TO on the Bengals, McNabb on the Redskins, even everyone’s favorite, Tim Tebow!

I ran a quick simulation and the Patriots beat the Vikings in the Super Bowl.  The ratings are spot on.  This game never gets old.  Who needs Madden when you’ve got Super Tecmo Bowl?

Shout outs must be given to drummer4god AKA Ricky Rigsby for bringing the rosters up to speed and knobbe.org  for keeping the Tecmo Super Bowl action alive! I was told somewhere on that site you can find Tecmo Super Bowl rosters from every NFL season since 1969. If you’ve got the link, post it in the comments. 

With the help of TSBTool Supreme, we will try to continue to update the rosters, or maybe Ricky will just keep pumping out great roms and we won’t have to do all that hard work.

Check out other Nintendo football games
Visit The JOCKpost Game Room homepage

As per the usual legal requirements, if you play these games without actually owning them, you may be breaking some copyright laws where you live.

He also further hurt “The Commissioners”, the 2-time defending champ of my fantasy football league.

You see, we play with rookie keepers, meaning if you draft a rookie, you get to keep him for life. My team already blows goats, only having 3 (now 2) of a possible 4 preseason spots filled. The reason it blows is because those spots are filled by Aaron Rodgers (good) and Darren McFadden (blows goats).

Now I’m down another man.

But the Commission has always been a scrappy bunch, and we’ll find a way to rebound. This next title will be for you, puss-bag. Thanks a lot asshole. I hope Christ pays as well as the NFL.

First it was LeBron leaving his home-state, taking notes on all the people that have talked shit about him - now it is Ben Rapelisberger, changing his hometown in the Steelers Media Guide because he was displeased with unflattering comments made about him by some residents of hometown Findlay, Ohio.

The media guide now has grey dick listed as being from Corey Rawson, Ohio, which is a fictional place. Probably because any other non-fictional city would have not wanted to accept him as their own.

Athletes these days…such prima donnas. I mean, if Charles and Marilyn Manson (not related) can continue to claim being from Ohio after the massive bad pub they have gotten, then you would think a little rape claim would be brushed over in a matter of weeks?

Long story short, Chambers married his stalker. Short story long, after Chambers quit tappin’ it on the side, the woman went “Fatal Attraction” on him. She started showing up to events Chambers was attending with his family. He even filed a restraining order against her and she was arrested on 11 stalking charges. This happened as recently as December of 09!!! Not to be defeated though, the stalker stalked on, and won her stalkee’s (is this a word?) heart. Chambers made her an honest woman in late July in a truly magical Vegas ceremony.

On a positive note, this has totally reinforced my theory that stalking can absolutely work when applied to the proper subject. Yes gorgeous, I’m talking about you.

These names are probably just cute titles given by media members as a way for them to be easily referred to. But for the fans that have lived through them, they have become much more – and it’s about time someone other than Cleveland fans have had to live thought them.

Due to the monopoly ESPN holds on sports talk radio, I was listening to Mike and Mike this morning, and right before they were about to go to a commercial, Greenburg mentioned they would come back and talk about “the holdout”. He didn’t have to say anything else, and I knew exactly what he was talking about.

The New York Jets are finding themselves in a shitty situation when it comes to Darrelle Revis and his desire for a new contract. And the fact that ESPN could possibly be giving it its own name could make it an even worse situation. Both sides, ownership and player, feel as if they are in the right. Revis did sign a contract, so ownership does not have to do a damn thing if they don’t want to. But Revis has definitely outplayed the $1 million a year deal that he is currently playing for, and if ownership can cut a player that has not performed up to expectations, I don’t really see a problem with Revis trying to get more money that he probably deserves.

But the real losers in the whole situation, once again, are the fans. If Darrelle Revis decides to sit out an entire season and “The Holdout” becomes a name that resembles that of the aforementioned Cleveland sports misery, then Jets fans will have to remember this as the year that could have been. 

The Jets have extremely high expectations this year, and with the “Hard Knocks” season premeire tonight, you know the “The Holdout” will be a feature topic of conversation – so the longer he sits out, the larger this beast will grow.

“You’re crazy McMahon!” you say. The Jewish folks haven’t had a legitimate American sports star to cheer for since “The Left Arm of God”, Sandy Koufax. But no longer.

The first major coup for Judaism came when freshly signed New York Knick forward Amar’e Stoudemire discovered that his mother was Jewish. How he didn’t know before now escapes reason. But it would seem that Stoudemire has been searching for something, as he has dived headfirst into the faith.

He immediately scheduled a trip to the Holy Land, and has been spotted rocking a yarmulke and some Hebrew ink!!

Talk about not fucking around!

Next up, was the Prince, LeBron James. He was spotted (and by “spotted” I mean he released a photo to TMZ) holding hands with celebrity rabbi Yishayahu Yosef Pinto.

The man only speaks Hebrew, which explains the Prince’s puzzled look- “I paid this mafaka $100k to speak gibberish to me?!?” No Prince, that’s the Yiddish. And yes, he did fork over 6 figures to a rabbi. Maybe if you weren’t such an ass leaving Cleveland, you could have got a priest to pray with, heyoooo!!!! They’re only jokes, folks.

These two major signings, coupled with the Jews renowned love a certain birthmark-rocking Super Bowl MVP winning QB, could bring about a new age in sports. Instead of every athlete thanking God after every small victory, maybe we will see athletes thanking, whoever it is Jewish folks pray too. Mazel tov, Judaism!!

According to the Texans and Cushing, the former USC linebacker failed his drug test due to Overtrained Athlete Syndrome. And while this apparently does exist, the fact that he thinks everyone will believe him might make him the dumbest person on the planet. Here is his claim.

“Everything points to that overtrained athlete syndrome,” Cushing said. “I’m pretty sure it is.  I’m pretty positive.  I didn’t take anything.  It’s not a tainted supplement.  So all roads lead to that.”

All roads lead to that huh?

I understand that athletes feel like it is best if they lie when it comes to steroids. I guess if they are dumb enough to take illegal substances, then they are probably dumb enough to lie about it.

Personally, if I was busted for something that I know I didn’t do, I would be absolutely furious. I would scream at the top of my lungs that something is wrong until someone listened. I sure as hell wouldn’t wait an entire off-season, then make up some bullshit excuse as to why I failed.

Either way, Cushing is still going to serve a four-game suspension for the failed drug test. If he was smart, which he obviously is not, he would have just shut up, sat out his four games, and everyone would have forgotten about it by week 6. Now he might go down as having the worst excuse for failing a drug test in sports history.

Rookie hazing is alive and well in Denver.  Tim Tebow has gotten a haircut from teammates in a style we haven’t seen since Friar Tuck rocked the bald spot as Robin Hood’s wingman.

LenDale “Tubby” (or is it “Smokie”?) White, the touchdown machine from USC’s championship-team-that-never-happened, who has now inexplicably landed with Broncos, tweeted in typical lmao-fashion:

@THEREAL_LENDALE http://twitpic.com/2ckyyv – Look at Tim Tebow’s new style, lmao… Looks good ROOK!!!!

Now that he’s rocking the Friar Tuck, is Nike going to have to make some special-edition sandals to go along with those shoes they sold out in five minutes?

Twenty bucks says Tebow took it in style.  He probably brought in his own clippers and gave them tips on how to achieve optimum results.

What those teammates don’t know is that they are all going to hell.

Veteran NFL referee Bill Leavy, who is infamous for some of the worst calls the Super Bowl has ever seen, has apologized to no one in particular for some of those horribly bad calls.

“It was a tough thing for me. I kicked two calls in the fourth quarter and I impacted the game and as an official you never want to do that. It left me with a lot of sleepless nights and I think about it constantly. I’ll go to my grave wishing that I’d been better. I know that I did my best at that time, but it wasn’t good enough. When we make mistakes, you got to step up and own them. It’s something that all officials have to deal with, but unfortunately when you have to deal with it in the Super Bowl it’s difficult.”

For all the flack the NBA catches for being fixed, no one really points to crucial times in the NFL when it just seems that one team is destined to win, no matter what.  Super Bowl XL was one of those times.

The key plays Leavy was apologizing for were probably these:

• Seahawks receiver Darrell Jackson was called for offensive pass interference on a play that he scored a touchdown. Seattle was forced to kick a field goal instead.
• The Seahawks stopped Pittsburgh quarterback Ben Roethlisberger on his 1-yard line. Leavy upheld the touchdown call after a replay review.
• Early in the fourth quarter, tackle Sean Locklear was called for holding on a pass completion that would have put the Seahawks at the Pittsburgh 1-yard-line. There was no holding on the play.  After the penalty, Hasselbeck threw an interception.
• Hasselbeck was called for an illegal low block and given a 15-yard penalty on the tackle after the interception.

While Pittsburgh fans were busy gloating, Seahawks fans were busy screaming CONSPIRACY from the top of the mountain.  The media went crazy.  The NFL had plenty of reasons to tilt this game in the Steelers direction.  Let us not forget that NFL is a business like any other, and profits rule the day.

Most NFL fans, except for Steelers fans, would prefer to forget this game ever happened.  The most memorable play was a holding penalty.  Even some Steelers fans wish they would have won under different circumstances. 

One puzzling thing is this apology was completely unprovoked.  Before meeting with the Seattle media to discuss rule changes, for reason known only to him, he went off on this tangent.  It is doubtful the Seattle media or anyone else really felt like reopening this gaping wound.

The apology is ringing hollow wish Seahwaks fans, though.  As most who left comments here, are either telling him to shove it, or are pointing out the myriad of ways that this game was fixed.

According to Deadspin, former Jets Quarterback Brett Favre sent Jets sideline lady Jenn Sterger sexting-like pics including one of him masturbating to her cell phone. He also apparently left flirty voice mails, but according to Sterger, nothing happened between the two because in her words, “Some big boobed hoes have morals and souls believe it or not..”

And while I am sure there are some “big boobed hoes” that do have morals, I’m not 100% certain she fits in this category.

Jenn Sterger sees the fame that came out after Erin Andrews was videotaped in the hotel room, and even though Favre is probably a creeper, you still have to take everything she says with a grain of salt. Not that I know this chick personally, but like T.O. says, “Like my boy tells me; if it looks like a rat and smells like a rat, by golly, it is a rat.”

Sterger is most “famously” known as being the Florida State girl with the big tits. Sorry, that’s about the best description I can think of.

I am sure there will to be more to this story in the upcoming hours.

But something doesn’t feel right.  If he really were retiring, do you really think he would do it via text messages to teammates?  HA!  He and ESPN would create a 3-hour special that would make The Decision look like Romper Room.

I am surprised it took this long.  Brett must be really enjoying his time off.  Now that football season is around the bend, the time has come to be in the headlines again.

There is one thing vastly different about this year than last year.  No salary cap.  The Vikings could sign Favre for $100 million if they wanted to.  Brett is no dummy.  He knows the game and how it works.

He supposed to make $13 million this year.  With him coming off what was possibly the best season of his career, he knows that the time to make some last-gasp cash is now.  I wouldn’t be surprised if he wanted $18 or even $20 million to play this year.  That’s a lot of Wrangler jeans.

There’s no question Favre gives the Vikings a chance at the Super Bowl.  They certainly have very little chance without him.  Ladies and Gentlemen we present to you, Super Bowl Champion Quarterback Tarvaris Jackson! No.

I guess the question to Zygi is: How much is a Super Bowl worth to you?

But no matter how many times I hear it, until I see him actually not playing when the season begins, this is all just hearsay. As his agent has even said, Brett Favre is the biggest drama queen on the face of the earth, so this could be just another ploy in getting fans and the media to start talking about him again – regardless of how much we really don’t want to.

So if this is true, let’s all start the celebration! I guarantee Tarvaris Jackson has already cracked open a 40oz.

Over at Pardon The Opinion, I have recounted the Terrell Owens and Chad Ochocinco Top 10 Touchdown Celebrations.  Now it’s time to dive head first into the world of wishful thinking.

If LeBron, Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh can wow us with their artistry on a 94-foot basketball court, why can’t T.O. and Ochocinco synchronize their spectacular creativity in a 10-yard end zone?

Ignore, for a moment, NFL rules prohibiting such craftsmanship from exposing its beautiful self to our ready-to-be-amazed eyes. Here are a couple of TD celebrations I would be privileged to see.

Joe Horn 2.0

Joe Horn introduced the cell phone to touchdown celebrations when he caught a pass from the oft revered Aaron Brooks. Due to the limitations of the era, Blackberries and iPhones were yet to dominate our lives.

But now that some genius has allowed every idiot to express his frustration at having to mow the lawn through twitter, T.O. and Ochocinco must take advantage.

While I’m sure it has passed through Ochocinco’s mind to tweet a touchdown celebration, I would love to see a T.O. retweet of an Ochocinco tweet from a phone hidden in the field goal padding. Or, even better — a T.O. response via twitter that tags Ochocinco.

A Joe Horn reference in either tweet would be icing on the cake. Twitter has been around too long for something like this not to have happened.

The Vuvuzela

Ochocinco has already hinted that he may bring the famed vuvuzela into play, but T.O.’s arrival allows for an added benefit.

Instead of Ochocinco scoring and then breaking out the horn, the touchdown scorer (either T.O. or Ochocinco) could imitate the Landon Donovan headfirst dive, followed by the other adding to the stadium soundtrack through the vuvuzela.

If that is not to your liking, the tweeting combo can be followed by a vuvuzela blow right in the face of the opposing middle linebacker.

The Pylon

Ochocinco has employed the pylon once before as a golf club. But never before has Ochocinco had the advice of a caddy on the football field. Thus, enter T.O.

After the touchdown, T.O. can collect all four pylons, hold a quick discussion with Ochocinco and choose the appropriate club/pylon.

To continue with the Tiger Woods salute that Chad cemented with a Tiger fist pump, T.O. and Ochocinco can flaunt their high-fiving abilities with an awkward, hand-holding high five that questions both men’s sexuality as opposed to emphasizing the excitement of the moment.

If you are unfamiliar with these Tiger/Steve Williams interactions, check it out here.

The Shoulder Pads

I am not the first to disparage Dez Bryant for his unwillingness to carry Roy Williams’ pads. Not that Roy Williams deserves special treatment, but that’s beside the point.

Hopefully Ochocinco spun this mini-Dallas-training-camp-fiasco into a world-class celebration. And by world class, I mean the following: Post touchdown, Ochocinco proceeds to take off his shoulder pads and hand them to T.O. When T.O. refuses, Ochocinco hurls his pads away and stomps off in frustration.

Only if there was a way to work in Dez Bryant stealing Roy’s starting WR job.

The Albert Haynesworth Commemoration

This one would be for all those unfortunate souls who could not bear witness to the abomination of Albert Haynesworth attempting to pass his conditioning test.

After the touchdown, Ochocinco prepares to sprint across the end zone, sideline to sideline. Meanwhile, T.O. starts him with his imaginary stopwatch. But halfway through his sprint to the other side, Ochocinco would stumble and ultimately collapse, panting and refusing to get up.

Okay, so maybe this is more of a mocking then a celebration, but would you be upset to see this in the end zone on a lovely Sunday afternoon?

Read more from Dylan at Pardon The Opinion